Sad but True: 'Fat, Ugly or Slutty' Aims to Raise Awareness of Gamer Misogyny

It would seem that if you are a chick who likes to game, you face a serious amount of scrutiny and downright misogyny if you reveal your gender during the course of your gaming experience. So much so, that there is a site dedicated to showcasing these messages received by female gamers, called Fat, Ugly or Slutty.

According to the site:
Some players like to send creepy, disturbing, insulting, degrading and/or just plain rude messages to other online players, usually women.

We think this is funny.

Why do they send them? There are a few theories. But instead of getting offended, we offer a method for people to share these messages and laugh together.

If having these messages posted online makes someone think twice about writing and sending a detailed description of their genitals, great!
Sure, Fat, Ugly or Slutty claims that they are making the best of a bad situation and just curating this collection to highlight the ridiculousness of the ugly comments. And yes, the best way to deal with a bully is with humour or by showing them the pathos in their actions. But the content of these messages is so graphic and vile, it amazes me that people are willing to put up with this in the course of normal gaming.

Some (most?) of the comments are juvenile banter (and frankly questionable propositions that read like email spam - LOL) but some of them are so graphic, wishing the femme gamers personal harm, including rape and sodomy. It's trash talk taken to an extreme level.

Now, the site doesn't say just how prevalent this kind of messaging is, but they seem to have amassed quite the collection submitted from females who know about the site, which I assume is a small fraction of the ones who actually receive these types of messages.

I am a geek but not a gamer girl. And I was aware of h8rs before, but I had no idea that trash talk could get so extreme. In fact, I found the whole concept quite surprising. Is it a cultural thing? Is it normal for gamers to wish harm upon each other in such graphic detail? Do male gamers vilify each other with similar types of comments?

Some of the submissions mentioned that their younger siblings were watching as they played, and that they wished they hadn't seen the messages (especially in the case of women playing with their younger sisters watching). With so many kids getting into Minecraft or Halo, it seems that they might only be clicks away from witnessing or being subject to inappropriate comments from a new online "friend".

The Dude has requested to buy online credits for games, but at 9 we think there is a bit he needs to learn about gaming etiquette when competing in the same room before we open the door to online gaming etiquette. He'll be there very soon, we know, but meantime sites and stories about this level of trash talk make me want to extend that timeline or step into the zone very warily.

I'm curious: If you're a female gamer, has this kind of behaviour ever led you to stop playing a game or refrain from sharing your gender during a gaming session? As a man, have you witnessed it? As a parent, have you come across it? Or are these extreme cases?

Head on over to Fat, Ugly or Slutty or check out the very tongue-in-cheek video below to girl games should behave online:



(Source: Pancake Theorem)

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